Rape and making a mistake when drunk are not the same thing.

I try to steer clear of truly controversial topics but given I've talked about Islam this week I feel like I should talk about rape tonight.  This follows an article I read on News.com.au.  Basically a judge said that there'd be more rape convictions if fewer women got drunk.  It wasn't clear in what he was saying but what he was saying is that it's hard to prove lack of consent when someone is drunk.

Okay so here's the scenario to lay it out.  You're 18 years old, you're out dancing with your friends.  You have a few drinks.  You eye up a guy at the bar.  He eyes you up.  You make out on the dance floor.  You then end up back at his place.  The next day you regret sleeping with him.  You claim rape.  Sorry honey, that's not rape.  That's just a decision you wish you hadn't made.

To put it another way, most of us who are older than 25 have slept with people we wish we hadn't, and more often than not it was when we were incapacitated.  How many times do guys wake up and regret having sex with the girl they had sex with?  I'd bet it's a lot if we were to do a straw poll.  Now you don't hear them claiming rape, but given they were drunk when they went home with a chick does that make it rape?  No.  It just means they were drunk, and desperate and "banged" the first "hot piece of ass" that they saw. 

If they didn't regret it the next day then the simple fact of the matter is that it wouldn't have been a one night stand (which often these things are if you meet in a bar).  If they didn't regret it, they'd see the girl again, and occasionally that does happen, but it's very rare.  I only know of one couple who originated out of a pub's one night stand and they recently got married.  They know who they are.

The problem with the News.com.au article is that it tries to put bad decision making and rape in the same category and they aren't the same.  Nor should they be treated as such.  And it's wrong for women to claim rape just because they made a bad decision when drunk that they later regretted.

I worked it out about a year ago that out of all the guys I've slept with, I'd only sleep with about 1/4 of them again, the rest nah, not so much, and they were all when I was drunk. 

Rape is explicitly - not consenting, and saying NO.  If you consent when drunk then sorry, it's still consent.

So here's what I'll leave you with tonight, if women can claim rape from not being capable of consenting, does that mean men can claim rape for the same thing?